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Monday 23 February 2015

Motherhood - Bump to baby

For as long as I can remember, being a mum was something I knew I wanted to be. I would always want to be 'mum' when we played house in school and if a teacher ever asked what I wanted to be when I grew up I'd say, "a mummy", (that and also a vet but 1/2 ain't bad). This desire never really left me for very long and I more or less just got more broody as the years went by. 
Now fast forward to May 1st 2014. I'm getting ready for work and I suddenly get the urge to take a test, I didn't feel myself in a way that I still cannot describe and lo and behold, the test was positive! My mind was racing, my pregnancy was not planned so a big part of me was in panic mode, I told Tom after I finished work and after talking it over, we realised we were both over the moon!
From this moment on, I was overjoyed. I had everything that I'd ever wanted. My pregnancy was lovely, I felt so blessed to be carrying our child and I adored my bump. The moment I saw my baby at our first ultrasound, I knew just how much I loved him (although I wasn't to know he was a he then). I cherished every milestone of my pregnancy from finding the heart beat for the first time with my Doppler to feeling the first kick and hiccups. I felt beautiful when I was pregnant and every movement made me so excited to meet the little human in there. 

I didn't think there was any way that I could love my little boy more than I did when I was carrying him but I was wrong. On 11th January 2015, Theodore entered the world and our lives became so much brighter and full of love. I spent so many hours in the hospital just staring at him, wondering how I managed to create such a perfect person. The feeling was overwhelming, I would move mountains for him if he asked me to, I would give him the world.




I can't believe what was once the size of a poppy seed is now a perfect little human that me and To made. He has made my life mean so much more and watching him grow each day is the biggest blessing. He has gone from my little scrunchy newborn to my beautiful smiley, lively 6 week old and I am bursting with pride each and every day.






Motherhood is so much more than what I had anticipated. It's hard and worrying but oh my goodness, it's more fulfilling, rewarding and amazing than I could have ever known. Without knowing it, he has filled me with happiness and joy for the best part of a year, from being my poppy seed to being my son and I intend on spending my whole life making him as happy as he has made me.



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